1. Being with Dad, even though he can’t walk, can’t talk, and may not always know who I am, is now a comfort instead of a grief.
2. We do what we have to do and priorities get clear in a crisis.
3. Moving Dad to a nursing home was not as terrible as I had expected and always dreaded.
4. Everything is relative.
5. I have an unlimited and unstoppable capacity to hope, like my mother.
6. No matter how much we may want someone to live, death will not wait.
7. Grief comes in unannounced and overwhelming waves.
8. Grief has a taste and odor and prickly needles and fills up your senses, and creates nausea, and is so much more than mere sadness.
9. Words of comfort are, in fact, comforting.
10. You can watch your mother expel her last breath, touch her cold hands in a funeral parlor, and sit beside her closed coffin at her grave, and have none of it seem real.